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Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes: Wasting Away?
The Daily Prophet has received an exclusive interview with George Weasley, owner of the Wheezes.
Once a shop filled with hope and laughter, Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes has now been reduced to a sad shadow of its former self. Two young boys with a passion for practical jokes and the determination to bring smiles and laughter to the wizarding world. A dream turned into reality, the Weasleys’ shop became a huge hit, as their many products became well known amongst Hogwarts students in the twins’ final year at Hogwarts. All this was made possible from a start-up loan proffered by none other than wizarding hero, Harry Potter. Now the store can be found at Number 93 Diagon Alley.
The Prophet has gathered some legendary stories of the store and its owners from eyewitnesses and friends as well.
“There was a time when Dolores Umbridge was seizing control of Hogwarts, and the twins – they released their entire stock of Weasleys' Wildfire Whiz-bangs all throughout Hogwarts’ classrooms. That day was chaos for Umbridge, the Weasley twins really were chaotic in Hogwarts,” Ernest Macmillan, Spell Developer at the Ministry.
“I remember when the twins had opened up a sizable swamp near Umbridge’s office. We teachers refused to do away that magnificent piece of magic. I still kept part of the swamp actually, it’s under a windowsill.”
- Filius Flitwick, Hogwarts Charms Master.
“One of the Weasleys, I’m not sure which one, gave Peeves an order, and he followed that order until the end of Dolores’ reign. Peeves. One of the greatest feats performed in Hogwarts, besides the Great Battle, if you ask me.” - Dennis Creevey, Photographer for the Quibbler.
“Fred and George, I remember when they had opened the shop and had a large inventory of defensive magics that were wearable. Clever pair, the two of them, they were two clever jokers.”
- Anonymous Source at the Ministry.
The shop ran successfully for a year after its grand opening, but when the Dark Lord waged war against the wizarding world, businesses were forced to close. Little did the world know, despite the Wheezes being closed for business, the two brave owners had taken up arms against the darkest wizard of all time. Tragically, only one owner left the war to help rebuild Britain’s wizarding community. With the loss of Fred, Wheezes has been struggling to recapture the hilarious charms that enticed witches and wizards of all ages. To many witches and wizards, the famously colorful joke shop appears to have been wasting away. However, we have received confirmation from George Weasley himself, that he has been working alone and is currently testing a brand-new product slated to hit the shelves soon. More information on the product can be found in the exclusive interview.
Now, last week, with the help of a Quick Quotes Quill, the Daily Prophet held a short interview with George Weasley, the owner of Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes.
Interviewer: Mr. Weasley, it is an honour to have you here today. Your shop, Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes – it’s incredible to see what has been accomplished in twelve years. You and your brother truly created a sensation. How was it for you during the war?
George: Call me George, alright? Twelve years ago, it was a happy time, when all we had hoped for in this shop began to come to life. You know Voldemort had us all rounded up in Hogwarts, thinking he could best us. I suppose he did... I lost half of myself that day. For a long time, I didn't know how to go on.
Interviewer: When you lost your work partner, your best friend, and your twin brother, it must have been devastating. Did you lean on anyone for support?
George: My family, we used to go around the room recounting all those jokes Fred and I used to tell them. For quite some time, I lost the ability to tell new ones, but eventually, it worked out. I lost an ear, you know! Ear humour never gets old.
Interviewer: What do you miss most about him?
George: It's a strange thing, but did you know that Fred used to tell the most ridiculous jokes? You probably never knew that about him, but he was quite the joker.
Interviewer: There were a couple of hard years for you, weren't there? The shop wasn't doing as well, and you working on your own. What are you doing to bring the shop back to its former glory?
George: Working on my ear humour. Never underestimate the power of not hearing a joke. But in all seriousness, I am about to release a new product, which is in memory of Fred. I call it the Flying Forge. It was something we had an inkling of an idea for, but never had the time to produce it. I sat on it for a while, but eventually, it got quite squishy and I figured any more time under my bum and it might be destroyed forever.
Interviewer: A new product? What can you tell us about it?
George: I can't tell you too much, as you'll just have to come by the shop to check it out yourself. All I can really say is, the Flying Forge is bringing a new level of pranks to the table.
Interviewer: It was a pleasure to have you here with us at the Daily Prophet. All the best to you, George, and may we have many more years of Wheezes for us all!